TW: body image

A few days ago, after my shower, I gazed at my naked, wet body. Just an FYI, this is no the start of a pornographic novel. While standing there and looking at myself I got a little choked up. My thoughts brought me back to my teenage-years, a time where I absolutely HATED my body and what I looked like. The hate ran deep and it took me years until I actually learned that damn grrl you look good!

I always compared myself to the girls in my school who had a bigger butt, smaller waist and/or wider hips than me. I was super self-concious. And it sure as hell didn’t stop there nay nay I say. Let’s not forget the 24/7 constant bombardment from the media at that time. Supermodels, actresses, musicians etc. I was a teenager during the years 2003-2009 and I want to remember that the focus on celebrities at that time was fucking crazy! Especially regarding their looks. Remember how mean people were towards Jessica Simpson? EMBARRASSING! How the hell did we survive it? How did she survive it? I hope she’s doing amazing today! She didn’t deserve any the hate she received and that also goes to the other celebrities who were victims to this complete cuntery because wow!  I never went as far as starving my self or anything like that which I’m incredibly surprised by because my thoughts was nowhere near healthy at all.

But the times has changed. I turn 31 in a month and a half and thank God for getting older and aging. Stuff like this doesn’t phase me anymore. I’m focused on what my body can do for me to stay healthy and focused on what my body have done for me to keep me healthy and safe. I guess that this post is just about me being grateful and thankful of my body because I hav not always been nice to it. One example is all these years with alcohol and yet here we are, still healthy and thriving! My body have literally kept me alive during all these years of abusing alcohol and smoking cigarettes ever since i was 14. How are my organs still in perfect condition? I’m not even going to question it and just say thank you! I hated my breasts growing up and were constantly told how big they were. But realizing years later that there’s a lot of women around the world who wishes that they had my breast size and even go as far as to have the surgery. I have mine all for free damn it and now I love them.

Your body is YOUR body. YOUR own beautiful body and no one elses. Do and eat whatever feeds YOUR soul and makes YOU happy. No one should ever criticize the way you look but the truth is, and unfortunately, some people do. That’s just projection of their own body image issues and has absolutely nothing to do with you. It never has and it never will as much as they’ll try to convince you that it is. Nope. Let them deal with their own demons since you’re a child of the Universe. I’ve mentioned it before that whoever has an issue with me and the way I live my life should talk about it to and with their therapist and figure out why my way of living triggers them so much. Which always comes down to their own insecurities and THEIR OWN VIEW AND PERCEPTION of what the ”perfect” body looks like. I hope they recover from whatever is hurting them but make no mistakes, whatever is going on with them is none of my business and it sure as hell isn’t yours either. And why listen to those who is not smart enough to understand that as humans exist in different shades and shapes, so does bodies and body shapes? Sounds very uneducational and plain idiotic to me but don’t mind me, I’m just sipping on my delicious red wine.

You are fucking beautiful just the way you are. Don’t listen to a very few people, that includes family members, opinion when there’s a whole world out there with literally billions of people with a difference in opinions. Obviously you haven’t met them all but there’s someone out there who finds you beautiful. You are their standard. The world doesn’t stop and end where you reside and I say this to show you just how insignificant those opinions are in comparison to our whole wide world. But the number one person whos opinion actually fucking matters is yours, please never forget that!
And also, don’t forget that peoples perception of someone being beautiful is different from person to person. There’s not one size fits all type of template in a world filled with all sorts of people from different walks of life and cultures. We all have different tastes and desires and our own reason as to why we find someone, or even something, beautiful. You fucking matter, you and your beautiful soul!

I thought about adding some pictures to this post but I have a bloated stomach situation going on so uhm.. no.